Monday, 12 March 2012


A couple of weeks ago we parked our car, we thought quite securely in a well know supermarket car park. We had reversed into a spot and at the same time a male driver with a couple of women passengers drove in next to us. He seemed agitated and walked off without his family; I can only surmise they were arguing. I had a bad feeling about the incident, he seemed annoyed we had reversed in just after him but there were two spaces to be had so we didn’t see a problem. We went around with our usual gusto and faced the customary shock at the end when it comes to paying.
Supermarkets fascinate me as they are a microcosm of society, children behaving badly, couples arguing with each other, people crossing in front without any consideration of people passing or waiting. I sometimes wonder why we don’t have some rules of behaviour within the confines of the supermarket, like a market highway code for example.  Wait at the alleyway giving way to oncoming people from right or maybe have a one way system so that we are all going the same way. I know, too difficult to put into practice but maybe some unwritten rules of etiquette might suffice? There seems a lack of patience and lots of ankle banging with some decidedly suspicious wobbly trolleys.
More than likely each member of the public who shops has some problem occupying the mind. For example the person on the mobility scooter who cannot reach the top shelves, the woman with kids who tries to control them with blackmail, you be good or there’s no sweets. We see an old lady who pushes the overly large trolley for few simple packages. Then there is the man shopping with the kids and a list obviously construed by his partner at home.  Loud music always playing in the background as one scours the pre packed fruit and veg offered as two for one, you know somewhere in there will be a mouldy or overly ripe fruit which will be rotten by tomorrow. I hate those deals because I know that the second pack will be bad before we get to eat it. Why do we bother I wonder? Also what of the single person who just wants to buy enough for themselves?
When we did eventually return to the car someone had deliberately scraped the side with what turned out to be a key or sharp object. As the driver of the car parked next to us had just driven away I can only assume it was him. Why did this happen I asked myself, why would someone do such mindless damage to our car? l do not understand the motivation behind this persons act of aggression. What causes this anti social behaviour?  Are they so angry they want to lash out at anyone they see? Have we lost the art of knowing how to control anger, how to manage what we feel? If I look back through my life I know I have felt angry about things, still do, I have been annoyed with complete strangers for some trivial behaviour. Saying all that I know for sure I would never do damage to anyone or anything. So what drives someone to do some anti social act which hurts the other? There seems to be a sense of outrage and dishonesty within the society, a small number I am sure but spread throughout like an oil spill on water damaging as it spreads.
Antisocial behaviour is not always obvious, we hear of random acts of wanton violence but there are those who flout the rules of society. I walk my dog each morning in a lovely spot overlooking the sea but so often it is spoiled for me by the site of dog poo along the path ways. I am a dog lover and I do not see the dog as the problem but the owners.  I know that we humans have an executive function in the frontal lobe of the brain; we have the ability to recognise the consequences of our actions, however, watching some dog owners I have to wonder. There are a majority of dog walkers who are quick and conscientious in their attempts to clean up after their dogs. Sadly, however, there is a high percentage which are not, individuals that allow dogs to run wild, oblivious of their behaviour. For many dog walkers it can be a social event which is great, for others it’s an opportunity to chat on the mobile and occasionally some can be seen intently texting with heads down, many seem oblivious to where or how many times their dogs have fouled. Some do the good deed of cleaning up, then for some unknown reason drop it to the ground and leave it there on the path way. Sometimes it hangs from the bushes like some jaded, abandoned Christmas decoration.
Last week some friends came to stay and went out walking my dog and came back appalled at the amount of doggy do-do around the Little Orme. Why do these dog walkers not recognise that it is spoiling that lovely sea view walk? I want to have good memories from my walks not a great blob of poo on my boots when I get home. I want friends and family to admire the scenery we have to offer when they come for visits not tell me how much it stinks of poo.
We humans do have the ability to distinguish between good and bad conduct. We are able to recognise what might happen if we do or do not take certain actions. Why then do so many of the dog walking brigade not see that leaving dog poo is wrong for all kinds of reasons. We have the aptitude to decide what to do for the best, we are supposed to be able to suppress unacceptable urges, but perhaps the antisocial dog walker does not give a toss about anyone else. I am proud to say that in humans all of the above qualities involve high mental function, not it seems for the irresponsible dog owner, or indeed the antisocial person who scratched my car for no valid reason which incidentally cost me around £200 to repair.

1 comment:

  1. I was just writing a post on anti-social behavior. Too funny. I really think we do have a problem. The grocery store is getting so bad I go out of my way to find times to go when the fewest amount of people are there. It drives me crazy when I'm at the end of the aisle waiting patiently for a person to come out and someone else goes around me and jams up the whole aisle instead. Grrr. Plus, no one says excuse me or pardon me. I always do and still do. I plan on single-handedly bringing it back. LOL My hubby would've been irate if someone did that to our car. It is such disrespect and meaningless violence.